Wayne,

When partners approach saving and spending from different angles, they’re bound to run into problems. As psychologist Olivia Mellan commented:

“The failure of people to explore their money personalities leads to deep misunderstanding and hurt. Take the case of a man who views money as security. He does not believe in spending a great deal on gifts; he believes in saving. He’s married to a woman who believes that money is both love and happiness; she’s a spender. They are about to celebrate a major anniversary. He spends days in record stores searching for the song they danced to when they were dating in the 60’s - their song. When she gets his gift, she thinks he’s chintzy and is insulted. He’s inconsolably hurt. She, meanwhile, has bought him an expensive gift.“ (Scott Stanley and Howard Markman, Marriage in the ’90s: A Nationwide Survey, 1997. Prep, Inc.)

Quick Cents Application Points:

1. Do you know your money personality? Click Money Personality Assessment (Note: broken link) to identify and learn about your money personality.
2. How does your money personality impact your marriage and other relationships?
3. What can you do to lessen the divisive impact of your money personality differences in your marriage?